Amy Koster, LPC
Vulnerability. Choices. Freedom.
“We need our lives back. It’s time to reclaim the gifts of imperfection-the courage to be real, the compassion we need to love ourselves and others, and the connection that gives true purpose and meaning to life. These are the gifts that bring love, laughter, gratitude, empathy and joy into our lives.” Brene Brown
Life Happens One Degree at a Time
I don’t remember making a conscious decision to try to be perfect. No one pushed it on me. I think it came from something in me that somehow believed the only way people will like me is if I uphold the qualities they value in me. If they said I was smart, then I have to always be smart- I can’t let them down. If they said I was beautiful - then that defines me- and I have to uphold that view to continue to have their love and approval. If they commented, “You have the most beautiful family,” then I had to make sure that image of “beauty” as they defined it, always remained. I don’t remember ever thinking any of that… but slowly, subconsciously, choice by choice… I began to paint this picture of “perfect” all around me.
When you’re busy making everything look perfect, living to please others, trying to keep everyone’s love and approval, you are not living authentically. You begin to make compromises in what you believe, in your values. You lose who you are. Not only are you making choices that are taking you further and further from where you wanted to be, but you also accept harmful treatment from others because exposing their truth would also mean exposing yours. So, you go further and further down a dark hole until you can’t even see your way out.
If you’re in that place right now, I know everything seems hopeless. It seems like your emotions have completely taken you over and you’re at their mercy….fear, anger, panic, desperation. Or maybe you’ve already moved into depression, and complete apath. You've given up and there seems to be no way out.
The First Step is the Hardest
I have been in that place, and I can tell you that there is a way out. There is hope. It just takes making that first step. That first step to be vulnerable. To live in the truth no matter how messy that truth is at the time.
My first step was to be completely honest with my family and closest friends. To strip back the layers of paint and be completely vulnerable. After that, and with their support and love, I had the courage to lay down anything that was hurtful to me or not in line with my values, and move forward, step by step, choice by choice, toward a life of Truth and authenticity.
Turn Right at Hope
One of those choices led me to go volunteer at a Pregnancy Center. These teenage girls and boys and even women and men, found themselves at the very point I had experienced, of fear, desperation and panic…facing a major life changing decision right then and there. In that moment of meeting those people where they were and walking with them at one of the scariest moments in their life, it was then that I knew I wanted to return to Counseling.
So I am here today ready to meet you wherever you are. I would love to help you:
“Get (your) life back. Reclaim the gifts of imperfection-the courage to be real, the compassion you need to love yourself and others, and the connection that gives true purpose and meaning to your life. These are the gifts that will bring love, laughter, gratitude, empathy and joy (back) into your life.” #freedom
Years In Practice
Adolescents and Adults
Individuals, Couples, and Families
- Abuse: Emotional/Psychological
- Anger Management
- Self Esteem/Self Worth/Identity Crisis
Bachelors in Psychology from Howard Payne University 1994
Masters in Counseling from UNT 1996
Solution Focused Brief Therapy
Redeeming Love - Francine Rivers
Schedule An Appointment
Please arrive 15 minutes early to your appointment to sign additional forms and/or, If you did not have chance to fill out the Life Tree Intake Packet. Just grab the clipboard at the window, complete the intake packet and I will be with you shortly.
Our business is run on a finite number of business hours scheduled. We recognize that things sometime happen and you may need to cancel or reschedule an appointment. If so, please call at least 24 hrs in advance (no emails, please) and give us an opportunity to help someone else in that time slot.
Failure to cancel (24 hrs in advance) or show up for your scheduled session will constitute permission to bill you for the time you scheduled.